Crossing Random Stories

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Remember when we were kids? We put a dollar bill in our shoes between sole and sock. Sometimes we had so many bills that it created a li...

Have you ever had a dream you won a million dollars, but then you woke up? So disappointing.

Have you ever gotten a text message that didn’t sound right? You know. You weren’t sure if it was meant for you or someone else? I’m talk...

I remember one time in high school when some friends of mine had a water balloon launcher. Now a water balloon launcher is like a big rubbe...

Ever been sitting in a stall and the other person leaves, but turns the lights out? Only so long before you start laughing uncontrollably. A...

As the Good Book says in Java 2:12, "A person who drinketh coffee diverts an hour of sleep, but a person who creates and serves espress...

ASU is out of control. Almost as busy as New York City. Collisions happen all around me, but I just pretend I'm Neo and can see everythi...

I just found out that I get up to a $1,000 bail bond with my AAA membership. Not only is it peace of mind if I need my car towed, but also p...

Ambush. I never knew my after-work evening would turn into an ambush, reverse-ambush, double-reverse-ambush, with a dispatch of police to ca...

Remember movies before animation got better than reality? They used to have real actors. I heard Pixar is now putting real actors into some ...

My order at Starbucks today: I wanna Double-Carmel Kimono Dragon Frap, no whip, quarter half-pipe 720 with three endo's on the side. Wai...

Remember when we had to use a smart phone to access the internet? Heck, remember when we had to use a computer to access the internet? Now ...

I need a microwave that has two buttons: Timer. Power. In the meantime, I usually end up hitting the 'popcorn' button just to get th...

Starting-up a new session of teaching for Summer 2010 is like me being hamster trying to power up a semi-truck. Can you picture it?

Teaching English to International Students during the World Cup is an interesting experience. Class sort of becomes an extra-curricular acti...

‎"Nice to meet you. I'm your new neighborhood." - Student

Spent all day Saturday reading a book called "Dialogue Activities: Exploring spoken interaction in the language class." Right now,...

In my World Cup bracket, I have USA going all the way to the Semi-Finals. If a miracle occurs and they do go to the semi-finals, then I'...

I don't know, just fly casual. -Han to Chewy upon entering Imperial Cruiser vicinity

Just drank my first sip of "Bragg Organic Apple Cider Vinegar All Natural Drink with a drop of honey". Seriously. It is diluted ap...

I don't have dyslexia, except when I try to write the word 'dyslexia'. Who ever came up with that spelling? "Kind of like s...

You're holding me? Who's holding you? -Lois Lane.

Just bought 3-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, bodywash. Looking for 4-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, bodywash, toothpaste if anyone's seen anythi...

Sometimes I dream of writing a major book like "The Shack" or "Wild at Heart" or even a novel. But, the other day I real...

Brought a rotary telephone into the classroom the other day for a couple of "phone message" activities. Showed them how to dial up...

Constructed a couple "present-perfect-tense" meets "simple-present-tense" activities at work today. I know most of you w...

PacMan's 30th anniversary today. Miss standing in line, waiting to play PacMan at the arcade. Put the quarter up on top of the video m...

A roommate of mine doesn't pronounce every part of three syllable words. Think about it. The time we could save by axing that third syll...

I've been brainstorming new children's-name spellings: M1ch0el, R^ndy, and R!ck. Maybe Je$$ica for a girl. Could add a question mark...

What I liked about the cassette-tape or digital answering machine was that you didn't have to listen to "Please leave a message aft...

Try marketing dry humor to a bunch of international students learning English. It's like beyond deer-in-the-headlights.

Students randomly smile while I'm teaching. I must be overly animated and random like some of the eccentric professors I had in college....

You know how most people start waking up earlier as they get older? 6am, 5am, then 4:30am. Well, I'm starting to move in that direction ...

I decided I have my own grammar. Me textbook and I not speak language the same and who my students learning incorrect grammar. Or, maybe the...

Remember when human beings were the best chess players? Remember life before the universal translator? I mean, people had to actually learn ...

My student's answer to a sentence completion activity focused on frequency adverbs was "Mr. Dunham occasionally works hard."

One of the nice things about being single is I'm never really alone. It's always Me, Myself, and I.

In college my friend and I walked by the Newsboys charter bus on the UofA campus. He said, "Let's knock on the bus door." The ...

In teaching a vocabulary class I've realized that my mental lexicon is primarily influenced by the likes of Alanis Morissette and MC Ham...

Remember Palm Pilots? It was so cutting edge.

Keyboards. So old school.

I love listening to my grandpa because he tells me about when they used to read text on computer screens or even used to read books that the...

Feeling a little nostalgic today. Remember when we had to use shuttle crafts before there was transporter technology? I mean, we had to take...

What life was like before A.I.? I heard that a long time ago, they had this thing called Google. You used your fingers to push buttons and t...

Who ever came up with the "ph" spelling for Steven? I know it's Greek, but I just don't get it. I'm talkin' a whol...

My friend received a Nerf Football at his 10th birthday party. I was there. We formed teams and took snaps. Five front yards became a footba...

Hiked Syphon Draw this weekend in the Superstitions to the top of Flat Iron. Really sore today. Talking to a friend of mine I said, and I...

My childhood Dairy Queen decided to shut down. I don't think it's allowed to do that.

Just finished a graduation ceremony at Rustler's Rooste in Phoenix for our Advanced ESL students. I don't really know what to say ab...

I'm reading Peter Pan right now. The (non-Disney) original version is rather rough-around-the-edges. Tinker Bell tricks one of the Lost ...

I am surprised at the number of comments I receive from my students about how nice and helpful Americans are when they arrive to the U.S. Th...

My students don't realize that my combinations of red and blue on the overhead are a subtle attempt to embed Wildcat aesthetics into Sun...

Time at the park with my nephew. Football. Soccer. Chinese food. Quietly watching golfers at the driving range. Duck feeding. Rock hopping o...

I keep forgetting that if I give them a lot of homework, then I have to grade a lot of homework.

I'm reading the original Peter Pan by J.M. Barrie, written in 1911. I think he might have been on something. I mean, come on... Wendy...

I'm not so sure what I think about the impersonal nature of the advances we've seen in technological communication lately. I mean we...

I don't know how many people I've had near collisions with on campus who are "texting-while-talking". If we weren't on...

I forgot they cruise around on skateboards so much on college campuses. I guess I'll have to break out the old cruiser, if I can find it...

In some cultures, the North East corner is actually the South West corner. Depends on your point of reference. Are you standing in the inter...

My mind has been in such a frenzy right that I tried to unlock my desk drawer earlier with my USB flash drive. Sort of like putting the milk...

I just heard a mom walking down the hallway say to her 3 or 4 year old son, "Are you coming stud-muffin ?" I'm all for male a...

One Friday night during college, I remember that Santa Claus (actually a college student dressed for a Christmas party) walked into my room ...

An old tutoring student of mine from Somalia asked me about whether or not I wanted to teach overseas in Saudi Arabia or the Arab Gulf where...

I overheard an older woman asking a librarian if there was a way she could avoid using a computer in order to do her nursing research. His r...

Deng Deng is a tutoring student of mine with the same first and last name. While helping him to fill out a form, I inadvertently gave him s...

When I was very young, I swore up and down that I had seen Mr. Rogers at an apartment complex around the corner emptying his trash one day. ...

When I was little, I thought door knobs could shoot laser beams at me as I walked past them, so I had to move quickly from room to room.

I have two friends. Their names are Peanut Butter and Jelly. Actually, that's their nicknames. Their real names are Jesus and Angel. ...

My friend received a Nerf Football at his 10th birthday party. I was there. We formed teams and took snaps. Five front yards became a footba...

When I was 16 years old, I could ride seven miles from my house to Squaw Peak Mountain, hike 1.2 miles to the top, and ride back home. Even...

When I was 12 years old, my friends and I used to ride our bikes and scooters to Tower Plaza, a mall about 5 miles from our homes. Mostly j...

I get all excited when books like "Grammar Practice Activities" arrive in the mail. Go ahead. Call me a masochist.

My freshman English teacher in high school required us to write our papers in cursive. Seems strange, thinking back on it. Needless to say, ...

Matt: Dressed in a cow outfit (complete with utters) and taken to Mill Ave. at ASU. Played Laser Tag afterwards. Of course the bachelor lo...

Checking out a book at the library these days feels so... well, naked. Sort of like the feeling of not wearing a seat belt. Sort of like t...

Three years old must have been a rough age for me. It's about that time that we are roughly the height of doorknobs and certain types of...

In my house, we have chickens that lay eggs for us. They lay about 3 to 7 eggs a day. They have a decent amount of space in their coop. KF...

Watched "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs" last night. Had a dream that I was at this rally where a young actor was inviting the...

Question: "Have you ever forgotten a friend's birthday?" My student's answer: "No, I haven't forgotten a friend...

In the mountains of Pakistan, a man once said to me, "This is Mohammed. He is the donkey driver." Sure enough, he drove the donkey...

In a large city in southern Iraq, a man once said to me, "This man you are talking to likes Saddam." The man smiled at me and left...

Taking a nap one time in my home in Iraq. Start hearing the sounds of machine guns in my neighborhood. Then, machine guns everywhere. Hundre...

In the mountains of Pakistan, I walked up towards a campfire. A huge explosion ripped from the flames. I cringed and curled sideways into a ...

Okay. So, I put on a size 7 today. I'm normally a size 8. No, not women's jeans. I'm past that phase. That's so 2003. I'...

One of my students wrote the following. Note the last sentence. It is touching because it is truer now. No longer a mask. "I go to scho...

I like using singular "they", "them", and "their". The English language needed a gender neutral alternative to...

NOVEMBER 28, 2009: Drove truck today with A/C on. Wore a T-Shirt. Could'a wore shorts. Unusual, even for Phoenix standards. When I was y...

Before cell phones and caller ID, everyone in the family rushed to answer the rotary or push-button telephone to see who was calling. 350 po...

I don't keep up with the news these days. We could be invading Australia and I wouldn't know it. Obama's still president, right?

Picked up some pink, ladies flip flops at Walmart. Seriously.

My ESL student wrote in a fiction story about a Utopian island-country, "There are almost 2,500 people in 'Freeland'. They work...

In Junior High, I took the school bus. Back in the mid to late 80's, Agua Net hairspray was the big thing. Hair stood at least 3 to 6 in...

Stopped this morning on a major thoroughfare to wait for a school bus in front of a housing unit that must have had a lot of kids. It was li...

I'm reading "Ricki Ricotta and the Mighty Robot" at the 3rd or 4th grade level. For some reason, my reading level keeps decrea...

Okay. Remember those times playing kickball in grade school when the kid with the loose shoe would kick the ball, and then it promptly flew ...

'It takes some nerve to walk up and knock on a giant's door.' ~C.S. Lewis, The Silver Chair. I think this is the understatement ...

Sometimes I wish I could be in charge of the universe. Things might be better than they are, right? But, I can't even balance my checkbo...

Stayed in a cabin with friends this weekend. Work projects at a church camp. I wake up in the morning and my friend says, "Does anyone ...